Category Archives: career

Interesting article about managing time terribly

“I’m terrible at doing what people tell me I should do, but I still get things done. I’m not sure why this is, but here is my best guess:

I manage my desires more than my time.”

I kind of like this guy’s perspective.

I  have a hard time managing time. It could be a learning disorder, it could be a bad habit.  I’m not sure and maybe it doesn’t really matter. The past year and a half have been a demonstration in my concentration problems.

I knew people in South Korea who returned after their year abroad to jobs the following weekend after getting back. Their focus and network contributed to starting a job right after the first one was finished. I have applied to numerous jobs in a couple fields I have really wanted  to work in without any luck yet.  I’ve  also applied to jobs in fields I have no interest in, and I have a hard time pretending to really want to be a phone operator or to work in the  clerk’s office.

Is it knowing themselves that lets others get farther, sooner? Is it their work ethic? Their friendly demeanor and lack of social anxiety?

People want experience and skills. I’m now going to work on getting more computer skills, and  asking around to others who have gotten jobs I would like to have eventually.  I have a small network and I want to fix that.

Then there are times when I go to Duolingo.com and start studying Spanish. Because I’m more interested in that sometimes, and because I can see results soon after. Yo soy una mujer. (<—-Don’t ask me to say anything more complicated than that yet.)  I may never get a job where I can use my budding Spanish skills, but does it matter? I like this website and it’s cool to think that I now have a little bit of knowledge.  It’s productive procrastination.

I want to see the world. I want to contribute meaningfully to my closest relationships but not be a pushover.  I want to remember and not forget as much. I want to be treated kindly.  I want to make a living and not be underemployed. I want to be able to save money to retirement every month.   I want to have a job where I can put some money aside, but can afford a vacation.  Those things I could answer in an interview, but instead I forget how to answer “where I see  myself going professionally.” I think part of my employment problem is that I don’t know where I see myself going professionally. I see where I want to go personally (sometimes) but I don’t know what kind of person I am professionally, other than one who needs to enter the professional world or risk never getting anywhere.

The gist of this article is that “getting ahead” can be more of:

saying no, telling the truth (to yourself as well as others), making time for others, and if it works better for you- not always finishing what you start in business.  The writer recommends losing to-do lists, and keeping track of “did” lists.

My favorite:

Don’t do hard boring useless things.

So much of what work is involves keeping the workers busy. Workers who want more meaningful work have to ask for it, but what I think ends up happening tends to be that they are just given more work instead of quality work.  I can give better work, even as I look for something better. If I can’t give my best at a job I don’t want for 30 years, it’s harder to believe I can give my best at a job I really want.

What some people fantasize about might be my greatest nightmare. This kind of stuff is subjective.

What are we talking about anyway? We are talking about your time on earth, so before you decide on how to manage your time, you need to know what you want your life to be about. You cannot have it all and therefore if you concentrate on one thing then something else will have to give.

We can’t have it all. When we try to have everything, something inevitably suffers. Even when we have most of what we want, it is at the expense of a former dream or desire.  There are a few things I have to decide about because they affect me and others, and being on the fence doesn’t help my personal relationships or my job prospects. I haven’t found my focus yet.  I used to think I knew who I wanted to be like. That hasn’t worked out, no matter who I currently want to be like.

Conan O’Brien says it well:

 “It is our failure to become our perceived ideal that ultimately defines us and makes us unique. It’s not easy, but if you accept your misfortune and handle it right, your perceived failure can become a catalyst for profound re-invention.” (from his 2011 speech at Dartmouth.

Ah, that was a cathartic little blog post. Perhaps I rambled a bit, too.

Here’s the link. http://qz.com/172718/if-you-manage-your-time-terribly-youll-get-more-done/#/h/44440,3,44448,2/

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not quite there with Employment

A job I applied for recently fell through. I was really hoping to get this one. A classmate from my university told me about the job opening. I deliberated whether I should apply, if I were good enough. Finally, I did apply.  After the initial phone interview, I picked up on a question or two that I didn’t answer so well. Due to that or a combination of better candidates (or both), I didn’t make it to the in-person interview. Right now, I hate phone interviews. There is this low feeling in my heart that I’m not good enough for any job that I really like. Is this all there is to it? I can keep looking, and keep reading books about how to figure these things out. I can apply for more jobs. I may have keep doing jobs that I don’t want to do  until I have the skills to start a career I really want.

Inspirational picture beneath sad-ish blog post.
Inspirational picture beneath sad-ish blog post.

 

Looking ahead

In 2014,

I want to make a few friends.

I want to take measures to be a better friend and girlfriend.

I want to start learning an instrument. I bought a harmonica.

I want to visit a career counselor and figure out a better idea of my skill set.

I want to take measures to help myself worry less and concentrate better. (and to be more Assertive)

I want to visit my friend Kate in the Midwest.

I want to do something that helps others.

——–

Here are my specifc resolutions:

Take a picture every day.

Write a sentence in my journal every day.

Take 3-5 minutes to breathe and do power poses in the morning.

Go to a career counselor for at least 6 sessions

Make time for friends at least once a month

( a possible bonus resolution: Take a class or join a professional organization to get more skills)

—————

“Research shows that one of the best predictors of emotional health is the ability to anticipate and savor future pleasures.”

-http://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/the-science-willpower/201212/five-things-you-can-do-instead-new-year-s-resolutions

Think twice before comparing yourself to a friend on Facebook

The thing that I forget about Facebook and Twitter and the Internet (and real life) is that no one has it totally together. It’s not an excuse to quit trying, but it is a reason to take postings and news on Facebook with a grain of salt.

Too often I’ll find myself on Facebook,  looking at everyone’s postings. I spend double or triple the time looking at other people’s stuff as I do posting my own  things. Sometimes I want to  delete it, and I know that would be band-aid at best. How to balance this fun world of living vicariously, with trying to figure out my own affairs?

I don’t want to compare myself to others so much. I want to be more calm and not say or do things I regret later.

Sometimes I just sit here and mindlessly type, and so I think I’ll stop here.

There is a lot to be thankful for. God is always good, no matter what I think.

New development

Today I had my first interview in  like two months I believe. It was nice because it was with someone I know through my bible study. It was so cool to see someone choose me to interview not just because they knew me (though that was the initial reason) but  also because my resume had no spelling or written errors. She is going to interview a few more people, and her fellow staff member had heartily recommended someone, but I’m still in the running. The trouble is that I am not sure if that is the field I want to go into or not long-term.  My friend said this was something important to consider, so I will do that. I want to be a good fit. I am also not sure if my temperament is the best for this as well.

I shouldn’t take just any job, I should have some aptitude for it. This is news to me. For some reason I just figured since I don’t have the aptitude for what I used to consider my dream job (study abroad advisor) that it didn’t matter as much what I did. With the way my mind works, I am more apt to come back to my short-comings instead of remembering how far I’ve come.  Why is it so hard to remember the good things about myself and to separate behaviors from my self-worth?

I AM valuable, and I HAVE TALENTS, even if I don’t know what they are. Even if it seems like I have nothing to offer this world. God made me with some kind of skill-set, and it’s my half of the bargain to keep trying to find a niche. Sometimes I want to give up. But then someone will remind me of all the things I have been blessed with, like growing up in a household where I never wanted for food or clothing or health care.

The world doesn’t owe me anything. God doesn’t owe me anything. He is waiting for me to notice him and to thank him instead of coming to him (and everyone else) with everything that is wrong. So what if I can’t concentrate the way I want to and I have trouble with assertiveness and accepting love and giving love to others? Those things are not the end of the world. I can make goals and dedicate myself to not just “becoming better” but to becoming the woman God knows I can be, and appreciating the good things about myself and those around me.